This is my second letter to you.

Michael, I want to remind you how much you enjoyed the bouncy house.  You had fun. Your sister had fun. The invited children all had fun. You were at your best in the new suite. So that is how we celebrated your 5^th birthday. 

Mama cooked plenty of food to feed the whole neighborhood. She had all the spices ( berbere, kibe, mitmita) imported from Ethiopia. She was cooking the whole week; beef stew, lamb chops, chicken sauce (dorowot), minced raw beef marinated in spices (kitfo), some vegetable dishes. I helped cutting the meat in small pieces. I was busy renting and putting together the bouncy house so you don’t strip on the wires. We had a special birthday cake from the local French bakery. Your sister was busy helping mama. You kept running in the house, jumping on the couch, pushing the door handle trying to get out to the backyard. All you cared was the bouncy house. It was a hot summer day. It really was hot, so we didn’t let you until it started to cool down some. It is a September in Florida after all.

It was a special birthday for all of us. We also wanted to make you happy. You still didn’t have words to express your feelings but everything else told us you were happy too.   I remember you pulling me to give you sweets before the guests arrived. I had spoiled you so of course I did.  I remember how mama gave me that look of hers. You held my shirt and pulled me again to give you more sweets.  I wasn’t surprised when you started crying when I said it was enough.  Too much sweet was not good for your teeth; I really meant it.   Then I felt bad and asked you what you wanted?  I wish I had extra senses to know for sure.

Miku, what do you want?

Please point to what you want.

Can you say give me?

Please say it. Please try.

You ignored me and went to you sister. She started playing the piano for you the new songs that she had been practicing for your birth day.

Mary had a little lamb…

Row, Row, Row Your Boat…

Happy Birth Day to you…

 Which put a smile on your face. You got excited and started to bite your hand. How many times have we tried to stop you biting your hand just for you to do it again and again when you got excited.

 At around 3 pm all the invited families and their children came one by one bringing you some gifts.  You didn’t care to greet any one or even make eye contact but jumped on the gift.

It seems as if everyone knew that all what you cared for is a car. Indeed, many cars! For an hour you were lost in the new toy cars turning them on and off, playing with them. You never cared to acknowledge the visitors.

Miku, that was just how you were then.  You only wanted to do what pleased you to do. You never cared about pretend play or baby dolls. That was sort of a waste of time for you.  You wanted to figure out how everything worked from the cars toys to the TV, to the  cabinet doors swinging them wide open and pausing as they close again.

Your mind learns differently. I wish that is how my mind worked so I didn’t care about trivial things.

Everything went well except that you made a mess of the birthday suite.  After the guests went home and after you and your sister went to sleep, mama sat down with me to reflect about you and your sister and the years ahead.

A handsome little boy lost in your world. We tried to join you in that world.

 We are still trying.